Saturday, January 31, 2009

February's Eve

Let me start off by saying the Holidays were wonderful this year. I can talk about the Holidays because our Christmas tree is still up, true confession. Anyway, I haven't blogged recently because of a tremendous January...

Josh and I are celebrating February's Eve tonight. Seriously, with the champagne, brie, bourbon-marinated cedar-plank salmon (YUM!), and movies together. This month was possibly the most treacherous in recent years compared to any other. Let's keep in mind that Josh and I have stayed ill with the "crud" all month, which is really the fact that mucous can not seem to find it's way OUT of our bodies. That being said, the month started with a loss in our family, Josh's aunt. He fairly quickly left for Chicago for about 6 days. This was difficult for he and his family to go through, and I was left with Mya to take care of by myself. Insert shout-out to all single moms of the world, I have a new respect for you.

The month continued to spiral downward when I got into a wreck on the way to work. No biggie, it was just me, I spun out on some ice and landed into a guard rail. This was more of a nuisance and inconvenience than anything else. Still, I had to miss a few days of work, get Mya checked out at the doctor, and my car still needs to be fixed. Thankfully, I was able to drive away, and the damage was really only cosmetic. I still cling to the truth that I'm a good driver.

Next, came the nasty revisit of the stomach bug in our house. Perhaps it was the peanut butter outbreak, but none the less, it was down right nasty. I only suffered the nausea, but Josh and Mya dealt at both ends. Cue laundry, Clorox, laundry, Lysol, and even more laundry. After a few meals of pedialyte, Gatorade, and chicken broth, all was forgotten. Wow, our house is clean!

This leads me to the worst part of January, and the most disheartening. I'm calling it the unfortunate debacle. A few weeks ago, I was supposing and had confirmed that I was pregnant. The pee sticks read positive, twice, and I set an appointment to see my doctor. The following days included the usual adjustments to this kind of news: initial shock and fear, then joy, excitement, and aspirations. I was genuinely glad in my heart to be expecting another child, after all we really want one more child for sure. Then, a few days later I began the process of a miscarriage. I was about 6 to 8 weeks along, and dealt with the physical loss on my own. Very emotional for me and very disappointing.

All this to say, the month of January is soon to be forgiven and forgotten. Spiritually, it has been real. For all the reasons my heart, mind, and spirit have been stripped, therefore God has been glorified. So, deeply I am thankful and I "consider it all joy..when encountering various trials, knowing that the testing of my faith produces endurance, and then allowing endurance to have its perfect result, so that I may be found perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." (James 1:2-4)

I was told that I would encounter a storm, and this has been it. Who knows if it is over. However, this theme runs through my walk with God: He is faithful. His mercies and grace are abundant, His joy is complete, and His love is enduring. Love so amazing. Here's to you, February! 2009, Take two!

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